March Moments 2009: March 43 - Present Tense, Chapter 2

March 43 - Present Tense, Chapter 2
by JoAnne Parente

(Editor's note: March doesn't end until we all decide it does - the ultimate antithesis of aging out. As long as entries for March Moments keep coming in, March keeps going, too.)


So, what does being reconnected to all of you mean to me on this Easter Sunday, some thirty+ years after aging out?

Quite simply put - it's validation that Albert Einstein was spot-on when he said that Coincidence is God's way of staying anonymous. At this time, in this place, we needed to be connected again for each other - and so, it happened.

The Internet (or more specifically, the Saints website, Guest Book, Scribblings, and now Facebook) has created a virtual Annex for us to hang out at, once again. We've come back together to share our joys and sorrows, to celebrate and commiserate, to tell tales and to listen with the heart.

There's a hymn by Marty Haugen that says it all ...

Let us build a house where love can dwell
And all can safely live,
A place where SAINTS and children tell
How hearts learn to forgive.
~~~
Built of tears and cries and laughter,
Prayers of faith and songs of grace,
Let this house proclaim from floor to rafter:
All are welcome, all are welcome,

ALL ARE WELCOME IN THIS PLACE!

Comments or questions about our March Moments series? Click here to submit, or if that doesn't work, send them to joparente DOT saintsdrumcorps AT gmail DOT com.

Reunion: One More Postscript

If you haven't yet done so, make sure to thank the following folks (in alphabetical order) who helped in one way or another to make it possible to gather together last Saturday:

• Pete Chesnovitz
• Rocky Chiocchi
  
• Althea Mazar
• Billy Meyer
• Denise Normandia Dube
• Jimmy (and Barbara!) Piccolo
• Ferd (and Pattiann!) Ponik
  

All for now - corpsdially yours from jo!

Weekend Wonderings: The Morning After ...

Man, oh, man, where to begin?

Just some disconnected ramblings for today ...

First, some shout-outs ... the Reunion Committee (what a crew you all are!), Mike the Caterer at Sewaren (not to be confused with Warren) Park, our ever-supportive family at Post 471 (extra thanks for bailing us out on the need for ice at the picnic!), and on a personal note, to Leslie and the staff at Somerset Medical Center for sewing me back together in time to see all of you yesterday.

Sometime over the next couple of days, I'll compile a list of everyone who joined us over the weekend. For now, I just wanted to make sure I had something out here for all of you to read (especially you, Mickey, when you get back to work on Monday!).

Someone asked me last evening what could be done to pay back the Reunion Committee in some way for all the work that was done - if I wasn't clear about it then, I will be now: HELP PLAN THE NEXT ONE.

Finally, a bit on legacy passed down from one generation to the next ... we had the privilege to honor Ray "Mr. C" Chmieleski, Uncle Tony Fastuca, and Alvina "Mrs. Chez" Chesnovitz last evening for their "actions (which) served to foster a corps family which still enjoys, over 40 years later, the days when the Saints came marching in." Among the many lessons they and all the other supporting parents shared, we learned generosity of spirit.

To those of you who kicked in some extra cash to make it possible for others to join us, as well as helping out one of our Saints siblings who lost everything in a fire last week, I am humbled by your actions. You challenge each of us to do more, living out our mantra in being Saints for one another, even 40 years later, because that's what family does ...

Love to you all!

All for now - corpsdially yours from jo!

Christmas 2007

Rejoice! Rejoice!

For many of us, these words are followed closely with Emmanuel shall come to you.

Christmas is a reason to rejoice - and for me, spending the good part of this year with all of you is one of the gifts for which I'm most grateful.

Here's a picture of me and Karen from earlier this month - Merry Christmas!

All for now - corpsdially yours from jo!

Thanksgiving 2007

One of my favorite sayings is that coincidence is God's way of staying anonymous.

Another way to phrase it - there are no coincidences.

It is no coincidence that Rocky was inspired to create www.saintsdrumcorps.com when he did.
It is no coincidence that we've been gathering our Saints family back together by leaps and bounds.
It is no coincidence that the connections have served as a lifeline for many at exactly the right time.

For all this, for so much more, for the big and the small, for the highs and the lows, I am grateful.

Happy Thanksgiving.

All for now - corpsdially yours from jo!

Weekend Wonderings: Going Home

The Annex was -- is -- a place filled with many significant memories from my teens and early twenties. A few of us can actually claim to have attended school there -- my seventh grade classroom (which became the kindergarten once the New School opened) was one of the few places in the building to which we DIDN'T have access while practicing there with the Saints.

Our growth as a corps was measured by how much room we needed to rehearse. In the earliest days, the cafeteria served us well -- twirlers on the stage, drummers in the Ice Cream Room, big guard in the back, horn line in the center, guide-ons in the side aisle. Soon, we graduated to the Annex, and even spilled over into the New School gym on Friday nights for a lot of years. I still find it a bit amusing that the name of the Annex was changed during those days to the Parish Center -- given that we had sole use for three weeknights during the winter season, and parts of the weekend the entire year, I don't think many in the parish really "centered" there like we did.

While we might have had a vague sense of it back then, having access to the parish buildings was a true gift. In particular, having the Annex as a regular place to gather, rehearse, store equipment, and everything else -- free but for the yearly donations made by the corps back to the parish -- made it easier for us to grow and succeed at what we did for those ten years we were together.

Since our reunion in October 1980, very few of us have had the chance to go back and spend real time in the Annex. The notable exception? Any of the guys who are members of the Knights of Columbus Council associated with Our Lady of Peace Parish -- and I know of at least one!

As I'm preparing for our reunion meeting this evening, my mind keeps wandering, leaving me to wonder ... Will it still look the same? What room will we meet in? Who will show up tonight who wasn't with us at Menlo? Will we get any planning done???

Expect a postscript sometime later this weekend, as well as some additions to the Photo Gallery on www.saintsdrumcorps.com ...

All for now -- corpsdially yours from jo!

Weekend Wonderings: Then and Now

Yesterday, I had the great and good fortune to spend a few hours with some folks you probably know. We hung out in the food court at Bridgewater Commons, exchanging career and job hunting experiences with one another. Before we departed, there were hugs, gratitude shared, and plans to meet again. My response back at one point -- That's what family does -- is one I've used quite a bit during the six months that www.saintsdrumcorps.com has been up and running.

I've spent a bit of time thinking about this, and in particular, what's it like to become JoAnne again to so many people (my husband and most others use my given name these days). When the opportunity started to present itself for us to get back together after all this time, a big part of me was excited to reconnect with all of you. The rest of me, though, experienced more than a wee bit of trepidation at the very thought of a reunion -- or even planning for one -- after all this time.

Some of my reaction was very ego-driven -- Lord knows I'm not in my best marching shape these days at age 52 and years of doing nothing but sitting in meetings and eating. A small bit of anxiety came from the idea of connecting with a handful of people from corps with whom, quite honestly, I didn't really have a warm-and-fuzzy relationship when we marched together. I'm guessing at least as many people felt the same way about me back then ... after all, I got a pie in the face at one point that proved it.

Great things happen over thirty years, though. We grow up, we get wiser, we value each other for who we were and more importantly, who we've become. We forgive, and ask forgiveness through our words and actions. We put aside anger, hurts, and what used to seem like huge age differences to become comfortable companions on this shared journey.

Bottom line -- families grow together, get along together, and get disturbed, pre-turbed, post-turbed, and all-around turbed with one another. It doesn't change that they're still connected through it all.

At the end of the day, without a doubt, even after all this time, here's the reality: If one of us needs something, we're each there to offer a hand ... a warm meal ... congratulations for small and big things ... a couch to sleep on ... a couple extra dollars to put gas in the car ... listening without judgment ... a shoulder to cry on ... a recipe ... a hug ... and lots of stuff I can't even begin to list.

Just like the old days, that's what family does.

All for now -- corpsdially yours from jo!

The Last Weekend

Wildwood Weekend ... the last full weekend I spent with the Saints back in 1976. I remember missing out on the normal Saturday night festivities because the semester had already started, and I had a pile of work that had to be done by the time I was back in class Monday morning.

I can recall with crystalline clarity many of the events of that weekend, but then, I had the priviledge of knowing that it would be my last spent with all of you before it happened. I had the chance to savor each experience, tuck it into my memory, and carry it with me as my journey continued away from my corps days.

On Tuesday, we remember the six year anniversary of the massacres that took place in Manhattan, the Pentagon, and ending in a field in Pennsylvania. The rhythm of the calendar this year means the dates fall as they did in 2001 ... meaning that this weekend is the last weekend any of us had before our world was shaken to its core.

There's at least one member of our Saints family who lost someone in their immediate family the Tuesday after that last weekend. Betty Dunn Hinkle, who marched in our horn line during the early years of the corps, lost her brother Patrick while he went about his normal duties at the Pentagon that Tuesday morning. Betty, this is the first chance I've had to tell you and your family how sorry I am for your loss, as well as to thank you for Patrick's service to our country ...

For those of you who haven't been in Fords for awhile, there's a street named after Commander Patrick Dunn not far from where the Turnpike crosses Main Street headed out to Woodbridge.

If you lost someone that day, know that my prayers are with you. If you would like your loved one included here in Saints Scribblings, please feel free to use the Comments feature just below, or let me know at joparente.saintsdrumcorps@gmail.com.

PS - this year, September 11th also marks the 25th anniversary of the day we lost Jean French, our business manager and my favorite boss of all time. Priscilla, Francee, and Trish, you're in our thoughts as we remember what an important role both she and your dad held in making it possible for us to be part of the Saints ...

On a personal note, I'm remembering in a special way my friend Nancy Collins who, for the first time this year, is spending September 11th in heaven with her firefighter son Johnny, rather than with Marty and their children at the ceremonies in NYC ...

All for now -- corpsdially yours from jo!

A Birthday Tribute ...

Fifty years ago yesterday, I was still an only child, we were living in Perth Amboy, and Eisenhower was in the White House.

What a difference a day makes!

Five siblings and a husband later, I can honestly say that Karen's birth is among the most profound events of my life.

By the end of the weekend, watch for updates to this entry -- I'll have some pictures to share with you, along with some other thoughts on being old enough to have a sister who turns 50 today.

Happy Birthday Karen, with love from jo and Rich ...

Postscript: Sunday, August 26, 2007


A great time was had by all at Karen's surprise party last evening. Hosted by her main squeeze, John, ten of us gathered to help her cross the threshold into AARPville ... in the pictures above with Karen are Lisa Maloney Wagner and John.


So, what does it feel like to have a YOUNGER sibling who's now 50? I'm still trying to figure that part out ... I'm just grateful we're still able to celebrate these moments together, surrounded by some of the people who are most important in our lives.



All for now ... corpsdially yours from jo!

Music, et al

More often than not since www.saintsdrumcorps.com has been up and running, my drive time has been filled listening to the shows I downloaded from the site and burned to CD.

The technology du jour when we marched together means the bulk of our recorded memories are only available in print or audio (we've only been marginally successful in tracking down the few people who filmed some home movies over the years). While there's an occasional sound of rifle clackers or flags shwishing on old tapes and albums, what makes vivid memories possible after all these years are those of you who were in our horn and drum lines ... I can still recall guard work we did because I can still hear the music you made.

During my active Saints years, a soundtrack for my own musical tastes was burned into my being. The Latin rhythms from George Lopez, the ever-so-patient first musical notes pried from us by Sonny Cataneo, the explosive growth of talent nurtured by Bucky Swan and George Tuthill -- there's no doubt when you look at my ever-expanding musical collection that they all, as well as some significant others during my corps time, played a huge part in creating the sounds and cadences I still carry with me.

There's no adequate way to say THANK YOU after all this time ... know that I carry each of you in my heart and soul for being such a big part of my life.

All for now -- corpsdially yours from jo!

Gratitude - Pass It On

When your morning starts with the surprises mine did, it's bound to have a great impact on what the rest of the day is bound to bring.

Many of us out there have morning habits. Rocky, our webmaestro extraordinare, needs his coffee to kickstart all his brilliant creativity (I know this only because he told me!). For me, I start with decaf iced tea and a freshly made waffle topped with cinnamon, followed closely by booting up my computer for the day. BTW, if you haven't yet made the leap to Internet Explorer 7, do so! IE7 allows you to have all your Internet windows neatly tabbed across your screen for easy access ... sorry, I digress!

Anyway, back to the story. Each morning, the first things I open on my computer are my various and sundry e-mail programs (another long story on why I use more than one), the Saints Guest Book on www.saintsdrumcorps.com, and a utility program or two.

Starting with the Guest Book, I see an entry about how someone is grateful that the site has allowed her to reestablish her Saints relationships. Next, I open a piece of mail addressed to me and a couple others saying how thankful he is that the site has allowed him to connect with certain folks that might not have been possible otherwise.

The THANK YOU that both the messages shared with me on a personal level brings tears to my eyes, a belated birthday gift to be sure. It's not the first time this has happened since the site has been up, but the messages reached me at a time when I really needed to hear them.

Priscilla, Pete, and all of you who have taken the time to express your thanks to me and others associated with the website, YOU'RE WELCOME, and THANK YOU for inspiring today's Saints Scribblings.

Do for someone else what was done for me today -- surprise someone with a simple way of expressing your thanks. You'll be a Saint for doing it!

All for now -- corpsdially yours from jo!

Fathers Day 2007

My first best wishes today go to my father, Babe, and my father-in-law, Bill. Richard and I are lucky and blessed to still have both of them with us at this point in our lives.

I also remember all the surrogate fathers I've had over the years, particularly through the Saints. While many have passed, there are still some with us. Hugs in particular go out to Ray Chmieleski, our corps' founding father, and Uncle Tony Fastuca, whom I hope to see very soon!

Follow the lead Peanuts has set today -- post your Fathers Day wishes in the guestbook on www.saintsdrumcorps.com. Let all those who gave up their Fathers Days to help get us to parades or on the field know how much you appreciate them!

All for now -- corpsdially yours from jo!